Friday, March 26

recent thoughts.

It's funny to think how different people can be. How you think you may start to know someone and then suddenly they dish out something new. How no matter how close you're getting, you really aren't making any progress. How, once you think someone is lifting you up, you think they will be that way forever. Unfortunately, people aren't constant. People are human.

I look at my friends and when they tell me things quite personal to their emotions, I think to myself "what have I done to deserve such trust?" One of the best things, one of the most sure things to make me smile, is to have someone come to me and trust me enough to let me in. To let me know just a little bit about their heart and who they are deep down inside. Some people show up out of nowhere and all I can think to myself is "you are here to bless my life, somehow, someway".

I believe that everything that happens does happen for a reason. The people you room with, the people you grew up with, the family members you have, the students in your class, the schmo on the street passing you by, they all are there for a reason. Whether or not you see it, they've changed you. That girl that walked past you and avoided eye contact was there for a reason. Maybe she needed you to bless her life, and in turn would warm your heart inside. Maybe that boy that holds the door open for you to walk out of the chilled wind will someday be your best friend, and your paths will cross again. The possibilities are endless.

Although, a lot of times, I think I'm overthinking things. I might be. I probably am, but my hope doesn't die. Everyone that I co-exist with is important to me. They are all children of our same Heavenly Father. If He loves them, why shouldn't we? Shouldn't we be honest and sincere with all our fellow men? Shouldn't we take an interest in their lives, even just for a split second? Shouldn't we make sure everyone in the room feels included?

Unfortunately, not everyone acts that way. Everyone has different perspectives and because of this, they act differently. Sometimes we feel so attached to someone that we feel they complete us. We don't want to let go even for a millisecond because they keep us breathing. But the truth is, we have to. We won't progress unless we take risks. I learned this the hard way. My best friend baptized me into a brand new life, and left one month later. I found a new best friend, and he left a year later. I'm finally standing on my own. I had to; the Lord comes first.

Now as I look around, I see the people that I encounter everyday. I see the 5+ boys in accounting that never fail to make me laugh. I see the boy and 3 girls that always make me smile in New Testament. I see the 3 boys in chemistry that keep me sane when the microscopic world doesn't make sense. I see the girl in animal science that keeps me motivated. I see the girl in agriculture orientation that inspires me to be the best I can be. I see the people who are willing to save some time for me and make me feel included. I see the best friends that I have grown to love. And I see in my heart the friends that aren't physically present, but that I know will always have a place in my heart.

I have a sign up on my wall that reads "Wherever you are, it is your friends who make your world". I have always believed your friends reflect who you are. Our parents were right to teach us "choose your friends wisely" throughout the years; there was a reason for this. There's always a reason. It happened for a reason. Do we know? Not necessarily. Will we ever know? Yes. When? The Lord will reveal these things to us when He sees fit. Trust in Him. And have hope.

Hope will get you through anything.

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