Love can be described many ways. In my short life, I have experienced love and lack thereof. I have given my all to someone and have had it returned, and it is one of the best feelings I can imagine. Love can also be of a less romantic nature. Love is always choosing the highest good for the other person. You can love that boy walking down the street. You can love that elderly lady you have never made eye contact with before. At this time in my life, I have a sense of love that I haven't possessed in my past. I can love someone by sacrificing my own needs and putting their's first. I can give an acquaintance a ride home during the night. I can listen and talk and make eye contact with someone who just needs someone, right then and now.
I'm at school. In the month I've been here, I've had my plate full. I've cried from homesickness and loneliness. I've cried from misunderstandings. I've cried for selfish reasons. I've cried from being hurt by others. I've also cried for people who don't understand the greater meaning of life. I want them to come to Him so badly and the fact that they won't take that first step breaks my heart. Also, I have met so many fun, energetic people. New friends from the ward send me random links to share with me what they do in their spare time. I love it. Girls on the field will have short conversations with me about anything and nothing while waiting for the ball to reach this side of the game. One Sunday, a girl looked me straight in the eye and asked if I could give her a hug. With a caring "yes", we enbraced and she said "oh, you're good at this!" Made my day. I sent out a "random love text" and had people respond with "that just made my day! thank you!"
That is what I love. That is who I love.
Loving comes easily when I place myself in the right circumstances. I let go of things I can't control and give them to God. I give myself to Him as best I can and ask Him for help to do so. I'm not perfect; no one is.
A friend shared a certain blog with me. As I read, I felt closer to the strangers on the street as well as this man who has shown a large part of himself to everyone who has access to the world wide web. Bravo! If I had more trust in the human race I may put more of myself out there, but for now, I am a shy little girl who loves her hometown and the people she meets. I don't have blunt conversations without safety nets and I am not rock solid in a lot of my opinions of temporal things. I do have my beliefs which no one can take from me and I do have the ones that matter most to me. Whether they are sitting next to me on the couch right now, or thousands of miles away, they inspire me.
You inspire me. Thank you.
I also love things. This may be shallow. However, the vehicle I drive has many a sentimental value. I drove it while learning with my permit. I took it for my license test. I have driven it all around Oregon and out to school. I have driven it on adventures. I have taken it to scary places. I have taken it to places my heart will never forget. I have had so many loved ones and even strangers in that car, and I can remember vividly many of them. As I turn my head for a split second and gaze at the pocket of air next to me, I see him. I see her. I remember him. I remember her.
I love my ring. It signifies my baptism and the day that would forever change my life. It signifies a friendship that will never die and that I can rely on for eternity to come. It signifies the last couple years of my life and how I will live my future. It testifies of the love and devotion I have for Jesus Christ, his gospel, his church, and the self respect I have.
I love trees. Call me a tree-hugger, I don't really mind. They protect, provide, and prolong my life. Of course, do trees count as something shallow? They are living souls that breathe.
So here's to posts with no outline and medicine for my under-expressed brain. Don't judge me and I promise you I won't judge you. This URL is for me, and me alone. If I can make someone laugh, or feel, or wonder, or love, my heart smiles. If I offend someone, I apologize you took offense. Remember, I love, or will eventually learn to love, you.
Victorious
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